21st April, Hot...
I have been having contractions all the time still. The pain is getting more intense. But yet, still nothing. Bleeding a little tiny bit on and off. Brown discharge also. My mum, dad, sis and Shawn all advice me to go for C-section. Safer if Nigel is out. Also will be a big relief for me. My family is all very worried as my kind of pain is not normal.
At the gynae visit, Prof Mary checked my cervix, only 1cm dilated despite all the contractions. And she doesn't encourage me to go for c-section. She will only perform the operation if the Baby is in distress ! But I'm in distress and soon because of it, Baby will be in distress !! And Shawn agree with her ! Plus there's nothing I can do about the contractions cos cannot take any medications. She says need to wait till contractions are more intense and closer then I can admit to labour ward. I told her mine normally start very intense, 5 mins apart more than one hour but will slowly become further. She says have to wait from 5 mins to 3 mins then admit myself. She thinks mine will be a long labour. And I have a feeling that I will be overdue and need to induce anyway !! Which I will rather opt for C-section than induction !!
I'm so upset that I cried all the way home ! and was still crying at home. And I feel like crying while typing this entry. If this goes on, I think I will get PNBs. Why do most women have smooth, normal pregnancy? And I have to suffer like this. Already lost one baby, went thru so much to keep Nigel safe and now, THIS !! I wonder what did I do in my past life ! The only good thing I can think of is the birth of Lil Niu Niu, if not for the little boy to distract me, I will be even more upset and depressed.... Niu Niu is really a lil miracle.
2 comments:
i can almost understand yr torture, tho not 100% since i'm not the one encountering it myself...i must say u have inhibited strength and tolerance in this pregnancy, and r just barely hanging on with a tiny thread now...poor jo...its been a tough road thus far.
Sad to say...I guess since yr gynae is pro-natural there is really nothing much u can do but wait. I read on motherhood forum abt a mummy giving birth in australia whose gynae is pro-natural too, end up she is overdue like u gg to expect it for yr case. But look on the bright side, since u are now 1cm dilated, there might be more to come in the next few days....
I guess at the moment what u can do is try to induce labour yourself, like walking more, doing some exercises and what not...
Me doing lots of brisk walking now. But my knee is aching from it. Had contractions yesterday night too, Was very bad. Each day getting more intense and painful. hopefully will be real labour soon !
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